Pure Buddha, Part One

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12/1/2019

Clarity

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To say I was pissed would have been an understatement. My fucking head hurt, and I was no longer SCW Adrenaline Champion. My head didn’t hurt due to a hangover, or because I needed a caffeine fix. No, Gavin Taylor had to use brass knuckles to beat me for the belt. Yeah, he did a number on my back, but I was able to keep moving.

Okay, sure. I was barely moving at that point, as I made my way to the backstage area. My teeth grinded together as I walked toward my dressing room, doing my best to fake it. Not like women fake it when they sleep with Gavin, or even Syren, but fake it as in hide the agonizing pain I was experiencing. When I reached my dressing room, my Alexa kicked on after I heard familiar voice say, “Alexa play “We Are the Champions” by Queen.”

“Fuck you Hank,” I said, slamming my dressing room door shut. “Alexa. Shut the hell up. Please.” Before the music could even start, it died out faster than Freddie Mercury when he combated AIDS. Too much, too soon? I was in a mood and did not care. At all. “If you wanted to play a song, it could have been something a little less upbeat. Like Jumper by Third Eye Blind.”

“Why the hell would I want to play something like that?” He asked, rising to his feet from the leather couch in the middle of the room. I looked at him, doing my best to not slap the ever-loving shit out of him for asking such a stupid question.

“Did you not watch my match, asshole?” I waited for a few moments. The only response I got was a shrug of the shoulders, increasing the urge to slap the ever-loving shit out of him. “Are you serious? I got robbed out there. I’m no longer champion. I mean, that should have been obvious since I didn’t come back here with a championship.”

He looked at me then at my shoulders, followed by my waist, like he was studying me for an anatomy exam. “Now that you mention it.” He began, his eyes continuing to study me. “Something is very different about you. You did lose your match. And your title. Holy shit.” He then looked at my head, his eyes growing wider the longer he stared. “What the fuck happened to your head, man?”

“I got popped with a pair of brass knuckles, asshole.” I growled, before brushing past him. I needed a shower. Maybe even a beer. Hell, maybe more than thought. My head and my thoughts were fucking scrambled. I was pissed. I was hurt. I was fucking embarrassed if I can be totally honest here. I grabbed a shower. The hot water didn’t bring any sort of comfort, but I stayed in there as long as I could, before getting dressed and emerging from the shower. Hank was still there. “So, what were you doing instead of watching my match like the good agent you’re not?”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I most certainly do, dude.”

Hank wanted to come hang out, as it had been quite awhile since we had done so. I told myself I should have brought Aidan with me. I did offer, but he wanted to enjoy the new apartment I set him up with. I couldn’t blame the kid. He was away from the shelter and deserved the chance to truly breathe in his freedom.

“I was talking with the wife. She is ready for some kinky shit when I get back home.”

“I could care less, Hank.”

“Look, I know you’re pissed. You lost your title. I’d be pissed, too. But hey, tomorrow is another day.”

“I really hate you.” I said, shaking my head and rolling my eyes. “I lost to that asshole. He robbed me. Had he beaten me fair and square…yeah, I would have been a little pissed, but not too much. I would have gotten over it, but no. He had to cheat. What’s sad is the fucker has all the talent in the world to get things done on his own.”

“You need to relax.” Hank said, putting his hands up and waving me down, which only annoyed me further. “Look, let’s get you out of here. Let’s get to Vegas. Just have a guy’s retreat if you want to call it that.”

“I don’t want to call it anything.”

“Either way, let’s go to Vegas. We can rent a bad ass car, and head down there. Listen to music. Have an awesome road trip, before having our minds blown in Vegas. We can hit the shows. We can hit the strip. We definitely need to hit the casinos, make some money. I know how much of a fucking asshole you are when it comes to playing cards.” I shrugged, knowing full and damn well how good I was at cards. I wasn’t about to argue that. “What do you say?”

“That sounds like a good idea.” I said.

He shrugged. “I can smell big fat but lurking around the corner.”

I nodded. “But…” I said, as we locked eyes. I could tell he was a little disappointed, but nowhere nearly as bad as I was. “I feel like I need something else. Something just to take the edge off if you know what I’m saying.”

“Don’t you get drug tested?”

I nodded. “Yes, but as far as I know, those are getting cut out because I’ve done so well.”

He sighed. “You really think doing drugs and partying hard is going to help you get over this?”

I shrugged as well. “Hell, if I know, man. But there is only one way to try if we’re being honest.”

He sighed once more. “As your agent, I don’t believe I can condone this behavior, but as your friend, I can say I get it. I just don’t want you to do anything stupid.”

“Stupid? Like what?”

Hank rolled his eyes. “Like heroin.”

Disgust ran over my face. “I wasn’t going to go that route. I was thinking…weed.” I said, with quite a bit of confidence. The entire idea seemed satisfying in a way. I knew it was a bad idea, but at the time, I just needed something to take my mind off Gavin and his bullshit. I knew I couldn’t murder him. There was no way I could get my Adrenaline Championship back that way. I wondered, briefly mind you, if I could tell management that I was off my meds and I truly wasn’t eligible to compete. You know…taking a page from Regan’s book. Or hell, I told myself. I could scream conspiracy like my name is Sienna Swann. While I would stare at my ass, as it would be my only perfectly constructed feature, I wouldn’t want to be her, so my mind went back to scoring some weed.

“Weed?” Hank asked, bringing me back to reality.

“Yeah.” I said with a nod. “I could mellow the fuck out. Sit on my couch for a few days. Watch some old movies since most of the new stuff that comes out is a fucking reboot, or it just plain sucks.”

“You should get Disney plus. The kids love it.”

“No, I shouldn’t.” I fired back, not in the mood for that sort of nonsense. A few moments of silence passed before I finally broke it. “So, do you know of anyone who has killer weed? I’m talking extremely exquisite weed, dude.”

“Let me see.” Hank said, before he began to scroll through his phone. When you’re famous, your agent basically has drug dealers on speed dial. I guess Nickelback had it right, right? I was going to use Hank’s connections to be a rock star.

“Oh, you’re going to like this.”

“Like what?”

“I’m sure this is a name you’ve not heard in probably what feels like a century.” He said, obviously filled to the brim with absolute glee. God, I hated him.

“Who in the Sam Hell are you talking about, dude.”

“Seth Flowers, dude.”

As soon as he said the name, memories flooded my brain, until confusion washed over me. “Wait…Seth Flowers…he’s still alive?”

He cocked an eyebrow. “Uh, yes. Why would you think he’s not? Or do you know something I don’t?”

I smirked. “There’s plenty of shit I know that you don’t, and that will forever be the case.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“I’m too busy fucking your mother.”

“You know she’s dead.”

“Exactly. I had too much stamina for her old ass.”

“I hate you, Asher.”

“The feeling is mutual.”

He groaned. “Do you want me to set something up or not? Jesus!”

I thought about it. Seth and I had history. It wasn’t all bad, but it wasn’t all good, either. Finally, I exhaled deeply and nodded, “Yeah, give him a ring. Let him know I’m interested in talking business. Oh.” I said, before I began to gather my belongings. “Let him know I’m glad he’s still alive.”

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12/2-12/3/2019

Chicago, Illinois

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On the plane trip back, in between random conversations with Hank, I couldn’t help but think about the history with Seth Flowers. Seth and I had grown up together. He was always the cool, laid back guy who never got upset about anything. It was pretty aggravating especially back in the day when I was nothing but a fucking hot head. That side of me showed back in 2008 and 2009. It showed up briefly during the lead into the End of the Year battle royal from 2018, and it showed up the previous night after my loss to Gavin.

It was a side of myself that I didn’t like. I always went to drugs to mellow me out. Drugs and sex. I had Rachel for said sex, as well as the drugs. In the present time, I had neither. I needed a high to help me come down from that side of myself. I wasn’t going to get into the rough stuff. I just needed to chill, something to help me zone out from all the troubles I felt were hitting me. The title loss. The haunting memories of my sister. Of Rachel. I wanted it gone if possible.

I remembered the first time I went to Seth for drugs. It was marijuana of course. I didn’t get on anything else until I started knocking boots with Rachel. He lived in some of the shittiest apartments in one of the shittiest neighborhoods in Chicago, but he had exquisite grass. I had to get buzzed in of course, because he was very particular and paranoid about who he let into his place. He had a good reason, I guess. He was always watching some sort sitcom when I’d arrive. I learned this the first time I scored from him.

He buzzed me in, and I went to his apartment. Knocked on the door, which he opened but only to a crack. Our eyes locked. “Asher?”

I looked at him confused, knowing he knew exactly what I looked like. “Yes, it’s me, dude.”

“Is it just you?” He asked quietly. It was sort of creepy if I’m being honest.

I looked behind me, starting to feel his paranoia taking hold of me. No one was there so I looked back at him and nodded. “Yeah, man. It’s just me. Can you just let me in, please. Shit.”

He sighed, closed the door, and I heard locks being unlocked, before the door opened, and I stepped inside. His place was a dump, but I knew I couldn’t expect anything less from a drug dealer. He wore a Bob Marley shirt, and some plaid pants. He didn’t match for shit, but hey, it was his sense of style. Who was I to judge?

“Welcome to my home away from home.” He said, before making his way over to the couch, which I had no doubt in thinking it came from a dumpster.

“You have another home?”

He shrugged. “I live with my grandmother from time to time. What of it?”

“Nothing, man. How are you doing?”

“I’m living the dream, brother.” He said, giving a shit eating grin that he had always maintained, even when we were kids. “How about you?”

“Oh, you know me. Just in the hood, looking to get some smoke.”

He nodded. “Then…” he paused as he fell onto the couch. “You have come to the right place.” He stated, before his hands went to work, opening drawers which exposed a never-ending plethora of sandwich bags containing nugget upon nugget of weed. I felt like I had died and woke up weed heaven.

“It definitely seems that way. So…” I said, plopping down on the couch beside him, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible, though I wanted to keep things cool. He was hooking me up after all. “What do you have for me?”

He began to list off names I had never even heard of, before he pulled got up and walked over to a dresser he had randomly placed near the kitchen. His hand emerged with a huge bag of weed. His shit eating grin widened, and I felt one growing on my own face. What he held in his hands looked beautiful. “What the fuck is that monster?” I asked, probably sounding a little too overjoyed, forgetting how bad I wanted out of there for a moment or seven.

“This is known as Pure Buddha.”

“Pure Buddha?” I asked, feeling confused and mystified by the name in of itself. “That sounds…fucking amazing.”

“It is my brother, brother. There is something about the way it mixes in with the airflow and I won’t get into that scientific stuff, but let me just go on record if I may…”

“You may, sir.”

“Let just say that it is the dopest of dopes to ever be considered dope. I went to town on a joint the other day, and I was Zen for fucking days, bro.” He said, the excitement in his eyes intensifying.

“How much for a quarter?” I asked. The want to get out of there grew, but only because I wanted to get to my place to indulge in the Pure Buddha that he dangled before my hungry eyes.

“Only ten more, my friend.”

I couldn’t get my wallet out fast enough. My finger grabbed the money as I said, “I’ll take a quarter.”

He got his scale and did his measurements and weighed everything precisely. For someone who looked dumb and burnt out, he was anything but dumb. Burnt out, maybe yeah. He handed me my bag, “Enjoy that, man. Oh, what am I saying? I know you will.”

I snatched the bag and got up from the couch. “Alright thanks man.”

I made my way out of his apartment, tucking my purchase in my coat pocket. I got in my car and headed home, figuring I’d use him for a little before moving onto someone else. Sitting on the plane, I told myself that I never would have thought I’d be hitting him up all those years later.

Yet, there I was. In the parking lot across from the same shitty apartment complex, in the same shitty neighborhood. Not much had changed. Okay, a lot had changed. It looked worse but according to Hank, Seth still lived there, in the same apartment. My vehicle ran as I sat there, not sure if I needed to get out. The thought of getting more of that Pure Buddha if he had it seemed enticing to say the least, but I was a celebrity now. Just as I was the last time, I saw him.

It was in 2009, leading up to my SCW World Championship match against Shawn Winters. The fans were cheering me then and Rachel hated it. She shunned me, so I came home. My father wasn’t too pleased with me at the time, because people were coming to their house, trying to get pictures and interviews. They were invading my parents’ privacy because of me. Plus, none of us knew that my father was sick at the time. He hid it very well. He didn’t hide his dissatisfaction for my newfound celebrity, however. He gave me some hardcore shit when I first arrived, and I had to get away. And where did I go?

Seth’s.

“What’s up compadre?” he had asked, as I stepped inside the apartment.

I sighed, before plopping down in his recliner. It was new at the time. “Dude, I had to get away from my dad. He’s been giving me shit.”

He let out a horse laugh that one simply couldn’t help but enjoy. “Oh, the struggles of being a celeb, bromosexual.” He was the guy I got that word from. It’s a classic I’ve not let die. “When I’ve caught the bus…” he didn’t own a car, mind you. “I’ve seen all kinds of peep…” he paused like he had literally lost his train of thought. His eyes widened like a light bulb went off, and he continued like he didn’t miss a beat. “People over there, harassing them. I wanted to go over and stop them, man.”

“And why didn’t you?”

Seth looked at me deathly serious, which was a rarity. “I always have weed on me, bruh. I can’t let people get their hands on my goodies.” And then, he did a dance as a throwback to Ciara and her one hit from 2004. Hey, when you want to lay pipe in college, you’ll do anything like listen to shitty music.

I laughed then just as I did as the memory faded, keeping my mind from conjuring up the bad stuff that eventually happened. I took another look at the apartment complex, before sighing and getting out of my ride. I wore a hat and had my hair pulled up as I kept my head down. My hands were stuffed in my pockets. I was doing all I could to keep my identity concealed. I felt I was doing a better job than Clark Kent, when in reality, I was probably wasn’t. I took a few moments before buzzing him.

“Hello?” a voice came through after I hit the button three times. The voice sounded tired.

“Seth?”

“Who is this?”

I looked around, clearly paranoid. “Asher.”

“Bullshit.”

“No man. For real. Its me.”

“Okay and what do you want?”

I groaned. He remembered how things went last time. I had just gotten clean from heroin. He wanted to do drugs. I got pissed and criticized him with all I had at the time, which was anger. “Dude, can you let me up so we can talk about this face to face? Its freezing out here, dude. My balls are becoming raisins.”

There was a buzz and then a buzz. I stepped inside the complex and made my way to his room. I knocked, and as always, he opened the door just a little, to where I could only see his eyes. “Asher. Asher Hayes.” I nodded. “Fucking Christ, dude! You got sexier!” he shouted before opening the door. Okay, maybe he didn’t remember. I blamed the number of potentially fried brain cells.

I smirked and nodded. “Thanks man, now let me in before someone sees me.”

He stepped aside as I entered the apartment. Nothing had changed. Like at all. The recliner and couch were still there. Oh, he got a Smart TV. “Looks like you moved up in the world.”

“Yeah man, I took all my money in savings and got that shit for Christmas.”

“Aren’t you Jewish?”

“A holiday is a holiday, man. Don’t judge.” He stated before sitting on the couch and propping his feet up on the table where he stashed his weed. At least from what I remember. “So, what can I do for you?”

“Ready to get down to business, already?”

“I’m a very important, bro. I’m in the drug selling business, and to quote Brad Pitt from ‘Inglorious Basterds’ cousin…business is a boomin!” He gave his horse laugh, and I found myself chuckling alongside with him. But it quickly died down. “But seriously. What can I do for you?”

“Alright.” I said, taking a seat in the recliner, before almost falling back out onto the floor. Once I got back to my feet and readjusted myself, I continued. “I’m in the market for some Pure Buddha.”

He grinned. “Such memories of that lovely strand.” His grind faded. “Sadly, it is becoming as rarity, like a virgin in high school.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard things have gotten worse.” I said with a nod, not really following. “Why is it rare? It wasn’t back in the day.”

He shrugged. “Times have changed, my man. People moved on from grass to meth. I blame the fuck out of Breaking Bad. Man, why did that shit have to be so good?” He asked before lightly kicking his table. I couldn’t tell if he was actually pissed or just high. I chose the latter.

“Yeah I heard it had some superb writing. Even won some awards. But back to business.” I felt myself getting a little annoyed, the urge to get the fuck out of dodge springing up like it did the first time I showed up at his apartment. “I feel you’re basically telling me that we can’t get it. Is that it?”

“Yes, my man.” He said nodding and smiling, like it was supposed to bring me some sort of comfort. “That is exactly what I’m saying. I got some meth if you’re into that.”

“Why the fuck would I be into meth?”

“Did you not watch Breaking Bad?”

I shook my head, throwing my hands in the air. “No.”

He shrugged. “Hmmm…then I guess that’s why. Would you like me to order a pizza or something, bro? We can watch some shit on the tube. I got the new John Wick. Heard its better than the last one. They said the same thing about the second being better than the first, and dude they were right. So, I have no doubt this one will be the dopest of all three.”

I could tell right then that he was lonely. That he didn’t get out much. The uncleanliness of his apartment told me that. I wanted to tell him I could call Adrina over to help out, but she would tell me to go fuck himself. Instead I sighed and shook my head again. “Nah, man. I think I’m okay. I’ll just head to my place. Maybe drink myself into a coma. Maybe that’ll help.” I turned away and made my way to the door, grabbing the knob and pulling it open to make my not so grand exit when he spoke, stopping me in my tracks.

“Do you want it that bad?”

I turned and looked at him. He was watching John Wick 3, his eyes were glued to the screen. I stepped back inside slowly, closing the door behind me. “Yeah, it’d be bad ass to get my hands on some.”

“I know someone we could get it from.” He said, still not taking his eyes from the screen as John Wick ran through the rain. I shook my head, as I recalled a time when people said I looked like Keanu Reeves. He’s cool and all but fuck I’m sexy. I’ll just never reach Keanu status. I’ve accepted it.

“Alright. Let’s hit them up.”

“We will have to show up at his place. We can’t just call him.”

“Okay, and why not?”

“He’s Shane Jones, bro. Only the biggest drug dealer in the city. Cops are all over his shit like herpes on my junk after I slept with that hooker.”

“Wait…what?”

He let out another horse laugh. “I’m just fucking with you about the herpes man. I did sleep with a hooker though.”

“Great.” I said rather quickly. “Back to this Shane Jones…”

Seth turned on the TV as he stood up. He maintained a grin as he grabbed his jacket. It had a tye-dye flower on the back, and some bedazzler shit. “On the way, man.” He said, as he opened the door. I felt I had no other choice but to follow him.

“Did you get a car?”

“God, no man. I’m too high all the time to drive. Could you imagine if I got in a situation like Keanu and Sandie Bullock did in Speed? Not only would having a bomb on my ride, kill my buzz, but keeping it over 50…that’s just too much of a hassle.”

I just nodded, having not the slightest fucking clue what to say to that. “So, we’re taking my car?”

“Hell yeah man!”

I showed him my ride, and he slid across the hood Dukes of Hazzard style, like he had done it a million times. All I could think about was the scratch in my hood. We got inside and he told me which direction to head in. “So, tell me about this Shane Jones dude.”

Leaning back in the passenger seat and placing his moccasins on the dash, Seth replied. “Like I said, he runs shit here in the Windy City. He’s a bad ass motherfucker. Sam Jackson had the wallet in Pulp Fiction. But out here, in the real world, Shane owns that moniker.”

“That’s great. So, is he a cool guy or anything? Like, should we be worried rolling up to his place, asking for some Pure Buddha?”

“Oh, it’ll be cool dude. There’s no need to worry my friend.”

I was surprised he called me friend after the way I chastised him years ago. We drove in silence as I didn’t know what to say. Thankfully my cell rang to break up the awkwardness. It was Cody. “What up, bitch?!?!” I asked playfully.

“Where are you, asshole?”

“None of your business. The fuck do you want?”

“I just wanted to know if I could stay over at a friend’s…”

“And what sort of friend are we talking about here? Is it like a dude you just hang out with? Is it a chick for like a slumber party? Or a friend like the friends I have…in terms of ladies? You know…the ones I lay the dick to…” I said, adding extra emphasis on that little bit I said.

“Oh my God, you’re disgusting. If you must know, its my friend Kate’s. Her family knows I’m gay.”

“Maybe she will set you straight. In more ways than one.” I said with a chuckle.

“Whatever dude. Can I go or not?”

I groaned. “Promise not to call me again tonight?”

“Didn’t plan on it.”

“Then sure I said. Try some vagina. It’s great.”

“Fuck off.”

“Love you too.” I said, before the call went dead. I chuckled to myself, as I loved the banter he and I shared. I looked over at Seth, who stared at me slightly confused. “What?”

“Who was that, Asher bro?”

I shrugged. “Oh, it was just my kid.”

He sat up straight in his seat, which I appreciated after seeing the dirt and dust on my dash. “Dude, you have a kid?”

I found myself rapidly shaking my head. “No, not my kid. Like I don’t have a lady…”

“You don’t have a lady? As sexy as you are? Such a crime, bro.”

“This is true. But I didn’t knock a lady up that gave birth to him. He’s nephew. He’s my sister’s kid…” I almost said that he ‘was’ but didn’t want to bring up memories of my sister’s death.

“Oh, thank God you didn’t bang your sister, dude. That would be sick.”

I looked at him, stunned by the fact he even uttered those words. “Yeah, it would. What the fuck?”

“No worries man. I banged her a few times.”

“Alright.” I said, as we continued to make our way through the city, before what he said really hit me. “Wait, what? You slept with my sister?”

He grinned and chuckled, before shrugging. “Dude, who didn’t? Besides you, of course. At least, as far as we know.”

“I will throw out of this fucking car, dude.”

“Its not going to change the fact that I slept with your sister, bro. It was all the time in high school.”
And then he pointed right. “Turn here.” I did, while I sat huffing and puffing over the revelation he just dropped in my lap.

“I need to call my Gam Gam. Can I borrow your phone?” He asked, and I looked to see him staring at me, intensely. I’d be lying if I didn’t say it made me uncomfortable.

“Sure man. Just stop looking at me like that.” I said, before handing him my phone.

“Hey Gam Gam! Its your favorite grandson. Yes, I know I’m your only grandson. What am I doing? I’m hanging out with Asher Hayes! Yes…” He groaned, playfully. “The hot wrestler guy. Yes, I know its crazy we’re friends. Wait, what? No, no. Gam Gam. I’m not going to ask him…” He groaned again, before looking over at me, placing the phone against his chest.

“What?”

“She wants to know how big your dick is…”

“What? Dude, stop that shit.”

“I’m being serious. Can you like…” He sighed heavily. “Just give me a ball park figure.”

“I’m not even going to fucking acknowledge that.”

“Fine.” He said, his statement was followed by another groan. “Asher’s shy, Gam Gam, so it means he’s probably huge. Yeah if you brag you lag, right? That’s what Grandpa told me. Well, I just wanted to call and check on you. See if you needed anything? No? You sure? Hell yeah. Major props on scoring that cheddar cheese from those old hags over there. Alright. Get some sleep. Love you too.” He then looked at me and handed my phone. “She’s the coolest. She is a straight up shark over there, playing cards against the other residents.”

“She’s in a nursing home?”

“Oh yeah man. And she’s really good at cards. Weren’t you good at cards, too? I can’t remember.”

I smirked. “You say that like I’m no longer good at cards. I’m still the bomb at cards.”

“Oh cool. I bet she’d play you…for a chance to look at that dick.” He said, with another horse laugh. I didn’t enjoy it that time as the thought of a grandmother grabbing my junk made me want to throw up more than listening to Sienna Swann cut a promo. Or to know that Katie Steward was still alive.

“Whatever man. Are we almost there, or what?”

“Turn right, and then go up this road here, bro.” I did as I was told, and we ended up pulling closer to what seemed like a very private residence. It was secluded as fuck, so I turned my lights off. Didn’t want to cause any sort of alarm, and have like armored guards running out with guns blazing.

The place was magnificent. And I could tell the owner was definitely overcompensating. Probably like Chris Cannon. “So.” I asked, as we sat in my ride, looking suspicious as shit. “How do you know this guy exactly?”

Seth shrugged. “I sell for him.”

“So, you know him personally?”

He shook his head, before reaching into his pocket, and I watched as his hand emerged with a rolled joint. “No. He goes through my like best fucking friend Jake. And Jake passes stuff along to me, before I sell it. It’s a pretty good system.”

“Savvy.” I said, before acknowledging the previously mentioned joint. “What the fuck is that?”

“Oh.” He said as he brought a lighter toward it. “It’s a joint. One of the last few I have of rolled Pure Budda.”

I nodded before realization hit me like a ton of dicks have probably hit Syren before she ran away screaming bloody murder due to her quote unquote vegan diet. “Wait…what? You’ve had Pure Budda this whole time? Thought you said it was rare.”

He lit up and took two tokes. “It is rare, bro which is why I keep as much as I can while I can. Know what I’m saying.”

“Do you even know the meaning of the word rare?”

“Not right now I don’t.” He said, before taking another toke or two.

“So, you get that from this dude?” He nodded. “You know you could have just sold me a joint. We didn’t have to come here. I would have been cool with just that.”

He looked at me with a scrunched face. “Dude, if I sold you a joint of this stuff then I wouldn’t have had any myself.”

“You could have gotten more from this Shane dude. No reason…” And then something caught my attention, causing me to lose my concentration. “Holy field fuck!”

“What?” He asked, looking at me, before I pointed toward the house, all while dunking down in my seat. “Oh shit, dude!” He said, before dunking down as well. “Why are is there a cop here?”

“Well you said your dude was the top drug dealer in the city. He’s probably being watched.”

He nodded. “Big brother sees everything.”

“God, that’s not what I’m talking about.”

“What are you talking about?”

“How often do you get out, Seth?”

He sighed and shrugged. “I check my mail.”

I went to reply but I saw the cop, a rather good-looking stud of a cop. What? I can think a dude is good looking. For one my nephew is gay, and for two, I’ve met Blake Mason. “Damn.”

“Yeah, he’s hot. I wonder how much he squats.” Seth said, as I saw him peaking over the dashboard. “So, you want to go meet him? And Shane, of course…”

I shook my head after staring at Seth really hard for a few moments. I didn’t want to slap him like I wanted to slap Hank the previous night in my locker room. But I’d be lying if I said the thought didn’t cross my mind. “No, we should probably get out of here.”

“Its not like anything is going to go down, dude. And even if the shit hit the fan, you look like you’re pretty fit.” True. “I’m sure you could handle yourself and defend us both.”

“Well, I am a wrestler.”

He looked at me, puzzled. “Like on TV and shit?”

“Yes. Like on TV…and shit.”

“I knew you looked familiar.”

I sighed. “We’ve been friends since we were kids.”

He nodded and chuckled. “Oh, right.”

“So, yeah let’s…” I choked on my words when I heard the sound of a gunshot. A sound I hadn’t heard since those dark days with Rachel. I looked at Seth, and his eyes grew as wide as man. We both looked over the dashboard, as we watched a Tom Selleck looking motherfucker stumble out of the front door of Shane’s house. He clutched his side. “What the fuck?”

“Go…go…go…” Seth said, showing some emotion which was rare unlike the Pure Buddha he smoked. I started to fumble with the keys when he said something else. “Oh shit! There’s Shane.”

I looked ahead and saw a rather rotund ginger haired man step outside in Nike sandals and a dragon covered robe that looked like it belonged on a toddler instead of an adult. “He’s got a gun.”

“Where the fuck is the cop?” Seth asked, still panicked. He breathed a sigh of relief rather quickly as we both watched the handsome cop step outside. “Oh, there he is. He will put a stop to…” And then, the cop raised his gun as he stood beside Shane. You could only see him since he towered over Shane, mind you. And he pulled the trigger. “Corrupt cop, bro! Go, go, go!”

I started up my ride, which of course caught Shane’s attention. “Oh shit, they are heading this way.” I heard Seth say, as I backed up, running over a bush or three, before pulling forward, scraping my car against the cop car before my windshield was met with some bullets, but we barreled the fuck out od dodge. I didn’t let off the gas for I don’t know how long.

When I felt safe, I took a long deep breath. When I exhaled, I couldn’t stop the words. “What the fuck do we do? What do we do?”

Seth looked at me, and I could see his eyes were glazed over. He was high. “We need to chill out, brother.”

“How are you high right now?”

“I smoked over half a joint.”

“That was before we saw someone get murdered! That was before we got shot at!”

He exhaled and shook his head. “I’ve been smoking weed since I was in the womb, basically. I’ve built up a tolerance. It takes a little bit to kick in. Its kicked in.” He said, before giggling like a teenage boy seeing his first pair of tits. On television.

I envied him and hated him at the same time. I took a few more deep breaths. “So, what do we do? We clearly can go to the cops.”

“Why?”

“Because a cop helped Shane kill that dude.”

“Oh, right. Maybe he was Shane’s sex slave and was role playing.”

“What…no!”

“True. Shane’s married. I think.”

“Good God man…do you ever think before you speak?”

He paused for a few moments, before nodding. “I did that time.”

I shook my head. “Where can we go man? I’m being serious.”

“I wish we could go like…nowhere…”

I bit my bottom lip as I squeezed the steering wheel. I took another deep breath. “Give me somewhere to go man. Is there anywhere you think we’d be safe. At least for a few hours until we figured our next move.”

“Oh, sure man. Why didn’t you say that in the first place.”

“I didn’t think I needed to, but okay.”

“We can go to Jake’s. He’s cool.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah man. Sure, I’m sure. He’s a good dude. He’s my best fucking friend, dude.”

“And how long have you known Jake?”

“Six months.” I said nothing else. All I could think was Jesus fucking Christ. I’m going to die.

We drove in silence the rest of way, except when he’d tell me where to turn, and then he said, “This is it.”

“This reminds me of my grandma’s house.” I said, as I pulled into the driveway, and into a two-car garage, after Seth instructed me to do so. He said it’d keep us concealed. I didn’t see how but didn’t feel like arguing. We got out of the car and I wanted to make something clear. “I don’t want this dude to know who I am, if he can’t tell who I am. Catch my drift?”

“He probably does. He stays at home in the basement. All he does is smoke, eat, sleep, and watch TV, bro.” Seth stated as I followed him to the front door. He knocked.

“Who it be?” I heard a rather obnoxious would-be gangsta voice say.

“Yo, J its Seth.”

The peep hole was slid open and I saw a pair of eyes. “And who is this?”

“Asher Hayes. The wrestler.” Seth said, completely fucking ignoring my request to keep my identity a secret if possible.

The door opened. The being I assumed to be Jake stood before us. He looked a lot like Jack Black’s character from “I Still Know What You Did Last Summer”. “Get on in here.” He said, playfully and we stepped inside. “So, what’s up my ninjas. Y’all good?”

“Why wouldn’t we be?” I asked, instantly. I was at the point where I didn’t know if I could trust anyone. Except for Seth. He seemed to be harmless as fuck.

Jake stared at me, appearing a little taken aback by what I said. “I don’t know, dude. I know you look a little shook up. Sexy, but shook up. And this guy…” He said, turning to Seth and grinning. “Looks sexy, either way.”

Before I could say anything, Seth began to blurt shit out. “Oh, dude we just saw a fucking murder over at Shane’s place.”

“Oh shit, dog! A fucking murder! Damn! And it was at Shane’s? Shit, I didn’t know he was going to throw a party tonight. Kinda glad I didn’t get an invite though. Sounds like shit got wild.”

“Oh, it did man. It fucking did.” Seth stated, excitement beaming in his voice, as well as his face, like murder was something he experienced every day.

I stepped forward, shaking my head. “No, dude. It wasn’t a party.”

“Oh.” Jake said, his grin disappearing. “Then why were you guys there?”

“We were there to get some Pure Budda. Asher over here was in the market for some.”

“Pure Budda fan, huh?” Jake asked.

A thought crossed my mind and I turned my focus to Seth, as I popped him on the shoulder. “Yo, dude. Where did that half joint end up, by the way? I don’t remember you putting it out in the ashtray or anything.”

Seth shrugged. “Oh, no dude. I tossed it out.”

“Where? When?”

“Ah, outside at Shane’s when we were getting shot at.”

I could no longer handle it. “Why the fuck would you do that?!?!”

“What do you mean?”

Seth went to reply, but Jake interrupted. “I’m going to go make a phone call. I need to call my granny. Y’all enjoy your fight.” He stepped away as Seth and I locked eyes.

“Dude, what is wrong with tossing out a joint? I do it all the time. Its nothing new.”

“Because we were getting shot at. If you’re the only person selling Pure Buddha from Shane, then he would know who was there. Or, he’d know where to start looking. Are you the only one selling it?”

He shrugged. “Yeah, as far as I know.”

“Jesus fuck. We need to get out of here.”

“Why? Let’s just chill here and watch some TV. Jake has like seven.”

“First off, why the fuck would someone have 7 TV’s? That’s beyond excessive. And two, you’ve only known this dude for six months. I know you say he’s your best friend. But if you’re the only one selling Pure Buddha, and you get it from Jake, who gets it from Shane then why wouldn’t Jake let him know we’re here?”

“You’ve known me for a few hours, Asher. What does time have to do anything?”

I sighed. “I’ve known you since we were kids. How many brain cells have you fucking fried?” Seth looked puzzled but before he could say anything, I started to head in the direction Jake went in, as I repeated my last question about Shane in my head. I got halfway down the hallway when Jake reappeared. “How’s the granny, bro?” I asked, before glancing down at my cell phone.

“Who?” He asked, before slapping his forehead. “Oh yeah. She’s good bro. Thanks for asking. I told her I was hanging with you and she wanted to know how big your dick is.”

“So, did mine, bro!” I heard Seth shout from the living room where we once stood.

Jake stepped closer but I didn’t budge. “Everything cool, dude?”

“I think so. I’m just curious about something though.”

“And what’s that?”

“Why would you be calling your grandmother at 2AM?”

Jake looked at me. His eyes grew wide for a second. He knew I knew that he knew I caught him. He sighed before his right hand met my jaw, and his knee met my testicles, as the air escaped my lungs and I dropped to knees, trying to get it back.

“He ratted us out!” I shouted, clutching my man parts.

Jake charged into the living room. I rolled over as I heard Seth cry out. I then saw Jake twisting Seth’s nipples before breaking a bong over his head. I caught my breath and stumbled to my feet. Jake turned around. “Shit!” I said before he slapped me again. He went to kick me in my balls once again, but I managed to catch his foot. I let out a laugh, before he slapped me again. “Goddamn it! Stop slapping me!” He shrugged before punching me. I stumbled back, before seeing Seth connect with a low blow from behind. Jake’s eyes grew wide as he exhaled. “My man!” I shouted, before grabbing Jake and hitting him with a belly to belly suplex, driving him through his coffee table. I got to my feet and turned, before running and jumping off his couch, nearly losing my balance as the fucking couch flipped over just as I did, before I hit Jake with the Ash-Sault! Shout out all to my real Asher Hayes fans out there for knowing what that is!

“Fuck yeah dude! You should be a wrestler, Asher.” I heard Seth say and I looked up at me and shook my head. “Oh, right. You already are.” I looked down at Jake, who’s eyes were closed. “Is he dead?”

I shook my head again. “No. I think I knocked him out though. I gotta work on that move. I’ve been known to hit people in the head with my knee upon impact.”

“Yeah man. You don’t want to be under scrutiny like the NFL for concussions and shit.”

“Scrutiny?”

Seth nodded. “Yeah it means…”

I cut him off. “I know what it means. Look, we need to get the fuck out of here.”

“The first time you’ve been right tonight, but I agree.”

“I’m not even going to acknowledge that comment with a response right now.” I said as I climbed to my feet. We made our way to my vehicle. I fired it up and we backed out of the garage, making our way out into the street before heading out the opposite way we came in.

“I can’t believe Jake ratted us out, man.”

“I can.” I stated, shaking my head, keeping my eyes focused on the road, making sure no cars busted a U to get behind us or anything. “I thought you said we could trust him.”

“We could. Up until that time he ratted us out.” Seth replied, with a heavy sigh. “We should have stuck around to interrogate him.”

I shook my head. “No, we shouldn’t have. We needed to get the fuck out of dodge before Shane and the cop, or whatever people Shane would send, got there.”

“Did you see how you manhandled Jake? Dude, I’m sure you could have handled yourself.”

“I can do pretty well in a straight up fight. But when guns are involved…”

“You buy drugs and don’t have a gun? Dude…”

I glanced over at him. “I don’t buy drugs. Okay, I was going to tonight, but I was buying from you. Do you have a piece at your place?”

“No.” He said after a few moments of pondering my question. “Never needed one.”

“Exactly.” I stated with a slight smirk. “Alright. We need to come up with a plan.”

“Alright, I’m all ears.”

I sighed. “I guess its all on me then. I think we need to go somewhere that will conceal my car, even if it pains me. At least until we can come up with something better.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Seth said, with a pause. “Where are we going to do that?”

“I have an idea.”

We drove as darkness slowly became light, but by then, we were parked in the Edgebrook Woods. We got out of the car and stretched ourselves out. My jaw still hurt a little bit from the hits I took from Jake. And the family jewels didn’t feel like they had forgiven me for leaving them vulnerable to his attacks either.

“So, I think the best idea is…” I began as we sat on the still scratched hood of my vehicle. “For you to just come with me on the road with my job. There’s like security fucking everywhere.”

“Like while you wrestle and shit?” Seth asked.

“Yes.”

“How’s that going for you?”

“Well.” I said with a shrug. “I really just got back into it.”

“Oh, did you retire before?”

“I kind of had to. Had a lot of issues going in my personal live. Some injuries too. But I came back, and I’ve been kicking ass for the most part.”

“For the most part?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I’ve lost two matches. One was a belt I won. Little fucker had to deck me with some brass knuckles. He was all about some cheap shots.”

“Cheap shots? Who was this pussy waste of space?”

“Gavin Taylor?”

“Sounds like a fruity drink elderly women drink.”

I nodded. “I had that same thought.”

“Well why wouldn’t you?” He asked. “We think a lot alike.”

I stared at him, puzzled yet again. “Alright, sure. So, yeah. I’ll check the schedule so we can get some tickets and get the fuck out of dodge.”

“I can be like…your manager and shit.” Seth said with a shit eating grin. “I will make sure you get your belt back. You saw how I connected with that low blow on Jake, right?”

“I did. I wanted to give you props on that one. It was effective for sure.”

“Showed we can be a great team, dude.”

“Something like that, yes.” I said, questioning what may have been going through his mind. “But I’d keep you in the back. Like in my locker room, and shit. To keep you safe, bro.”

“Right on.” He said with a nod, before looking up at the stars. “Its hard to believe you were the champion of all this.”

“Huh?”

“You were like World Champion, right?”

“No.”

“You can champion of other stuff?”

“Uh, yeah. But I could be World Champion.” I said, remembering the little surprise at the end of Clarity.

“Hey man, you can be anything you set your mind to. That’s what Eminem said.”

“No. I mean, yes he did say that, but there’s a match that’s going to take place on New Year’s Eve. I could enter the match and win that shit. I could get a new car, which would be nice since this one went through war last night.” I said, glancing down at the scratch Seth made, plus the scratches and dent from running into the cop car, followed by the bullet holes that riddled it. I told myself if I won the match, I’d get the money too, wondering if I could offer to Shane as a way to buy our way out of this mess. It was a dumb thought, but it gave me extra motivation.

“Then, I totes gotta be your manager bro. I will low blow the fuck out of every day that gets in your way.”

“There will be women in there, too.”

“Simple.” He said, and we looked at each other. I had my eyebrow cocked, letting him know I was confused by his statement. It took him a few moments, but he finally acknowledged said confusion. “I’d give them all a cunt punt.”

“Sounds like a fun plan.” I said with sarcasm that he seemed completely oblivious to. “Well, I’ll see if I can get signal out here so I can book us some tickets.” I began to walk around in circles, holding my cell up. “Shit.” I said, cursing myself.

“What up, Ash?” He asked.

“I got to call my nephew. He needs to lay low for a little bit. I don’t want him to be found. I will tell him to stay at his lady friend’s house.”

“Thought you said he was gay.”

“He is. Do you not remember the conversation we had last night while in the car?”

“I can barely remember ten minutes ago, bro.”

I sighed, before beginning to dial Cody, when all of a sudden, my phone got knocked out of my hand. I looked over and saw Seth. He looked bewildered. “What are you doing?” He asked me, suddenly panicked.

“What do you mean? I literally just told you…”

He shook his head. “No man. Don’t be stupid. There was a cop with Shane. They can trace your phone and shit. We gotta get rid of this.” He said, before grabbing my phone off the ground and charging toward what appeared to be the closest rock. I tried to stop him, but it was far too late, as he repeatedly smashed my phone against said rock. He then stood up, sighed and looked extremely proud of himself. “There. We should be good.”

Frustration flowed through me as I stomped toward him. Seth looked at me and I shoved him down. “Why the fuck would you do that?”

He stayed on the ground. “What do you mean? I literally just told you…”

I shook my head. “I told you I needed to use my phone to not only call my nephew, to ensure he was safe…but to book us tickets so we could get out of Chicago. To stay ahead of Shane and the cop…whoever the fuck else they may have working with them.”

“I did it to keep us safe man. I told you Big Brother is always watching dude. Big Brother works with the cops, who apparently work with Shane. They could have traced your phone if you made a call, and then they would have known where we were. They would have come here and probably tortured us than the CIA did those guys they thought were terrorists.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Have you not seen the Report on Amazon?”

“No. What the fuck does that have to do with…”

He cut me off. “It’s a great movie, dude. You need to check it out.”

“You need to shut up…Just shut the fuck up!” I said before turning away, like I figured SCW fans did when Bree or Sienna showed up on their screen, or out in the ring. I knew I had tried to go get a beer or two when I saw them. I leaned against my ride, looking down, trying to calm myself, when Seth finally joined me.  A few minutes passed before I smelled weed and saw smoke. I looked at him, over my shoulder, and rolled my eyes. “What are you doing?”

“Trying to mellow out dude. Don’t you think we need to? We almost came to blows, bro.”

I walked over to him. “Okay first off, it would have been no contest. I would have probably killed you.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“Oh, is that a fact?”

“Yeah.” He nodded before taking another toke. “I am a third degree…um…beige belt.” He said as he exhaled.

I fumed before slapping the joint out of his hand and stepping on it. We didn’t need goddamn Smokey the Bear showing up.

“Hey what did you do that for?” He asked.

“Because that…” I said pointing at the now deceased joint. “Is the reason we are in this fucking mess.”

“Nah man. You came to me, looking for weed. I was cool until you showed up at my door, wanting Pure Buddha.”

“You could have sold me a joint.”

“Then I wouldn’t have had any left, dude. Like I said earlier.”

“Way to think about yourself.”

“Whatever, dude. Don’t get on my shit. I was on the verge of a good buzz and you killed it. That’s like cock blocking a virgin about to get his first nut. There is some shit you just don’t do.”

“You’re an idiot.” I said. “You’re on your own, asshole.”

“That’s the way its been since you became all Holier than Thou all those years ago.” He said, finally acknowledging what happened the last time I had seen him before last night.

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t bring that shit up.”

“I’ve always lived a good life, man. I sold you bomb ass weed whenever you wanted it, and you didn’t even act like you wanted to there.”

“Well I didn’t.” I said, unable to stop myself from saying it.

“Oh.” Seth said, nodding his head. “Looks like the monkey is finally out of the bottle.”

“What?”

“The truth comes out. You know what? You’re on your own.” He said, before getting into the car.

I stood there, looking at him as he huffed and puffed in the passenger seat. I slowly climbed into the car and looked at him once again. “Thought we both agreed we were on our own?”

“I need a ride first. Then…we can go our separate ways.” Silence fell between us for a few moments. “Is that cool?”

I went to say something, but I didn’t. I sighed and shook my head, because really…what difference did it make?

_________________________________

SHOOT

_____________________

“In the Wrestler’s Justice system, crimes against the SCW universe and the SCW World Championship are considered extremely heinous. Depending on who you are.” My voice could be heard narrating before music kicks in. What was that music you might ask. It is ‘Times Like These’ by the Foo Fighters, because the SCW and its World Championship were facing hard times. I was about to change all that, thank you very much.

We were at the former Cook County Criminal Courthouse. It was redubbed The Hon. George N. Leighton Criminal Court Building in 2012. It was named after George because…well, let’s face it. He did a lot of shit. Good shit. It was such good shit that the city of Chicago named a courthouse after him. It was nothing less than a big deal, much like George himself, who I never met. But I felt like it the perfect place to have a court hearing.

And it was no ordinary court hearing. It involved the SCW and the wrestlers who have flooded the TV screens, as well as brains, of members of the SCW universe with never-ending boredom. That is why I was….get a shot of me. Yeah there you go. That is why I was dressed to the nines in a blue suit, white shirt and black tie with sexy boots to match, along with my hair blowing in the wind. I made my way into the courtroom, and the place with filled to the brim with members of the SCW fanbase, as well as a select few members of the SCW roster. Sure, if you were to look closely, Sienna Swann really wasn’t there. Thank God, too. I mean, I can barely stand to be around her when I just so happen to watch her on TV.

I paid some guys and gals who have been busting their asses to become full-time award-winning actors. I paid them, and even had them over for Christmas dinner as a way to show my gratitude. I didn’t want to deal with the overdramatic nonsense of the people I was going to put through a line of questioning to get down to the bottom of why the case was brought forth in the first place. I looked to my left and saw my client, sitting there, appearing calm, but I knew deep down that was simply not the case. I nodded, letting them know I was going to do my damnedest to fight for their rights, as well as their freedom from the evil clutches of Sienna Swann.

“All rise.” The guy I hired to be our bailiff shouted at the top of his lungs. We locked eyes and I motioned down with my thumb. He nodded before he continued his little spiel. “For the honorable Judge Oliver Drach…Drach…Drachovich!”

“Drachewych!” I shouted in between fake coughs.

“For the Honorable Judge Oliver Drachewych!” I knew he had the old man’s first name wrong, but he had to pronounce Drachewych, which I knew was going to be tough. I didn’t want to put any added pressure upon him by asking him to say “Oleska.”

Everyone I brought onboard rose, as needed, as I wanted this to be as legit as fucking possible. I had a newly found friend of mine, Kristen Rae, to film this. It was going to be sent to the SCW HQ as I had decided the night of Clarity to throw my name in the hat for the SCW World Championship Open Battle Royal at the End of the Year Special. The guy portraying Judge Drachewych walked out from the back, using a cane. I wasn’t sure if the actual Oleska still used one, but I have always pictured him with a cane, so that’s where we were with that. The actor was a little fatter, and bald up top. He looked more like Ron Jeremy than anything else, but I wasn’t about to ask Ron to show up. I heard the dude had herpes. I had wrestled Bree Lancaster, so being around Ron would have more than likely doubled my risk.

“You may be seated.” My would-be bailiff instructed. We all sat, and he continued. “Your Honor, we are here today to hear the case of the SCW World Championship versus Sienna Swann. We have Asher Hayes, attorney at law defending the SCW World Championship, and Bree Lancaster defending Sienna Swann.” The shot right then would show me stand up and adjust my suit jacket, looking sharp and hot as hell, before going over to a would-be Bree Lancaster wearing an suit that appeared to be made out of the American Flag, as she stood up, holding a dog. To her right sat a would-be Sienna Swann. We had to do a little bit of make-up work to pull off that praying mantis look Sienna has about her, all bug-eyed and shit.

Judge Drachewych received a manila envelope that had papers in it. They contained graphs indicating a decline in television ratings each time Sienna became World Champion or was heavily featured on SCW programming. Those same declines also occurred when Bree Lancaster showed up. Those declines became nonexistent when Syren tried to make people jealous when that simply was not the case. If you don’t believe me. Ask the judge. He had the photographic evidence in between his fingertips.

“Alright.” He said after reviewing said evidence. “Opening statements?”

Would-be Bree spoke up first. I wasn’t sure the order of things, but so be it. We just rolled with it, as everyone had their lines. I just hoped they didn’t sound as wooden as Chris Cannon was when he actually delivered a promo. It was rare, so I wouldn’t hold it against you if you had no idea what I was talking about.

“Your honor…” Bree started as she walked to the center of the courtroom. She turned and faced the jury. “My client, Sienna Swann is a good, strong SCW World Champion. She is for the people. She even puts a hashtag in front of it when she posts those words on social media, so you know its legit. My client is such a strong SCW World Champion that she has promised me, in private, at least thirty times that we will have a match for her title. Thank you.”

I watched as Bree sat down, and quietly scoffed before the Judge looked at me. I nodded as I took a look at my client, before rising to my feet. I didn’t rise as fast as people do to get the fuck out of an arena when Bree, Sienna, Syren, or even Gavin Taylor wrestle a match, or cut a promo. I took my time, making every second count as I always have before I stood in the middle of the courtroom.

“Your Honor…members of the jury…” I began, as I slowly made my way around the room. “This is a case about freedom. My client’s freedom.” I said, pointing at my client, the SCW World Championship. It was indeed a replica, but I didn’t want to touch the one Sienna held. Not until it was sterilized at least. “My client has been in the filthy clutches of Sienna Swann for quite some time. And while in those clutches, my client…like Ms. Swann’s attorney, has been passed around more times than a 40 oz. at a keg party. Sienna uses my client as an accessory. When carrying my client becomes too much, she lets it fall into the far worse hands of one Syren with a ‘Y’.”

I cleared my throat, looking down, and shaking my head for dramatic effect. I knew Sienna was into the drama, so I didn’t overdo it. “But, most importantly, it is my job here today to show you just how much freedom my client has lost since the association with Sienna began. My client has been exposed to different levels of abuse, and today I want you to see that enough is enough. Thank you.” I said, before returning to my seat.

The judge seemed to look over the documents before him, before he and I locked eyes. I couldn’t get passed the Ron Jeremy look, but I knew I had to. There were far more important things to deal with. “You may call your first witness, Mr. Hayes.” I nodded before shooting my client a reassuring look. I patted my client on the belt strap before climbing back to my feet, telling myself it was go time.

“Your Honor, I call…the man with more nicknames than inches of penis, Gavin Taylor.” A would-be Gavin Taylor, that I actually liked hanging out with from the night before, stood up. He looked like a douche, just like the real Gavin. Dude really nailed the part. He walked up to the stand, put his right hang on the copy of SCW magazine we had in place of the Bible so we wouldn’t get sued by real life religious groups, before he took a seat. “Good morning, Mr. Taylor.” He said nothing. I sighed and nodded. “Do you know my client?” He said nothing. I sighed and looked at the Judge. “Your Honor?”

Judge Drachewych turned in his seat, glaring at Gavin. “Is there a reason you’re not answering the question?” Gavin seemed to squirm in his seat, moving his head up and down, before shaking it from side to side. “Can you answer the question?” Gavin simply shrugged. “Need I remind you that you took an oath to tell the truth, and nothing but the truth? If you violate that oath, you could be facing serious jail time, much like the Adrenaline Championship now that it’s in your possession.”

The Judge and I locked eyes once more and I nodded. “I will rephrase my question. Have you ever to touch, or planned to touch, my client?”

Gavin sighed. “What is it, Mr. Taylor?” I asked, as I walked closer to him. He shook his head. “You need to answer the question, Mr. Taylor. Is there a reason you’re not answering?”

He sighed once more, before leaning forward. “Can you Tweet your questions?”

“Why would I do that?”

“You know that I can’t come up with an original thought.”

“Are you a coward, Mr. Taylor?”

“You know the answer to that.”

I grinned. “I do. I’d say the better question is do you know you’re a coward?”

He looked down, and slowly nodded. “Yes. Yes. I do.”

“Do you think my client would be better off in your hands, or if my client remained in the hands of Sienna Swann?”

Before Gavin could answer, a would-be Chris Cannon popped up behind him and ‘slammed’ Gavin’s head. Gavin bounced back and fell out of his seat. ‘Cops’ rushed over, and grabbing Chris, pulling his arms behind his back as he could be heard shouting. “I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! I’M TIRED OF HOW MY FIANCE IS TREATED DESPITE BEING ON SCW TV EVERY FIVE MINUTES! DESPITE BEING IN THE MAIN EVENT PICTURE FOR OVER THE LAST YEAR! I’M TIRED OF THE GAMES!”

The Judge slammed his gavel down, slowly restoring order as Gavin got to his feet and retook his seat. I looked at the judge and at Gavin. “No further questions your honor.”

“Ms. Lancaster would-be Mason, your witness.”

Bree stepped forward. “Mr. Taylor are you going to use the contents of this case in your next promo?”

He nodded. “Absolutely.”

“None of us are surprised.” She smirked before looking at the Judge. “No further questions.”

The Judge turned to Gavin. “You may step down. Hopefully you can use more than Tweets the next time you step in front of a camera to cut a promo, good sir.”

Gavin nodded. “We both know that’s highly unlikely, but I will give it my best shot.” As he made his exit, I reviewed my witness list before telling my client that went well. The Judge asked me if I had any further witnesses. I nodded as I stood up.

“Before I call my next witness, I’d like to make a strong suggestion, Your Honor. Especially after what occurred with Mr. Taylor. And I’m not referring to his lack of original thinking. I am talking about the lack of security.”

“What do you mean?” Judge Drachewych asked, scrunching his eyebrows, giving him a rather confused look like when I have had to tell people Gavin Taylor beat me for the SCW Adrenaline title. That look has gone away when I have reminded them that he cheated.

“Chris Cannon was able to get in here and attack Mr. Taylor. Just as Mr. Cannon was able to rush through the crowd at the most recent SCW pay per view. He attacked James Evans, and it was only after his attack that he was apprehended. I ask Your Honor, just as I would beg the SCW, to up the security detail. To make sure those guards are highly skilled and trained to do their jobs, so that tragedies like this never happen again.”

“Tragedies?”

I nodded. “Yes. A tragedy such as Chris Cannon’s career. He started off with such promise from what I remember. And now, he has belittled himself to be nothing more than Sienna Swann’s bitch…” I coughed and shook my head. “Pardon me, Your Honor. I meant to say Sienna Swann’s attack dog.”

“It is all the same, Mr. Hayes.”

“Right you are, Your Honor.” I said with a smirk.

“But I will take your suggestion into consideration. There is a good chance it will fall on deaf ears once I pass it along to my daughter. Do you think we could get Jordan Majors to pay for extra security?”

I shrugged. “It’s possible, but we’d have to keep it a secret, so Bree and Sienna don’t try to shank her. They are basic bitches like that.”

“Objection!” Bree shouted from her seat. “As the leader of Breemerica…”

Judge Drachewych cut her off. “Wherever you were going with that, overruled.” He then looked back at me. “Please, call your next witness.”

I nodded. “Your Honor, I’d call as my next witness, Chris Cannon.” The Judge nodded at the bailiff as we all waited once he disappeared behind the courtroom. A few moments later, he returned with ‘Chris’. Chris was sworn in, before I stepped forward. “Mr. Cannon, how do you know Ms. Swann?”

“I cheated on my wife with her.”

“So, she’s a homewrecker?” I asked, taking another step forward.

“She is an angel.”

I grinned. “Now, isn’t this basically how things go when you and Ms. Swann are in the ring? The crowd boos you. You go on and on about your personal lives, when none of it really matters? People want to see wrestling. They want to see action. Not listen to the soap opera dribble that you two consistently spew, correct?”

“Yes.”

I rolled my eyes. “Can you have a little conviction in your voice? Like you actually give a damn?”

“It is very difficult.” Cannon said.

“Like it is listening to you two.”

“Objection!” Bree shouted once again. “He is badgering the witness.”

The Judge shook his head. “It’s his witness.”

I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. “Mr. Cannon, how do you know my client?”

“I fought to get your client a few years ago but was unable to gain possession.”

I nodded. “I see. And you haven’t really had another shot. Have you?”

He shook his head. “No. I haven’t.”

“And your fiancé…Ms. Swann has held my client hostage three times in the past year. She has not offered you a chance to compete for the title while she’s held it. Is that correct?”

Cannon nodded this time. “That is correct.”

“And why do you think that is?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Do you think it is for the same reason she has not offered a shot to her so-called best friend…her so called equal, Bree Lancaster?”

He looked at me, puzzled as Chris Cannon probably did when he found Sienna using his Twitter account to send out Tweets pertaining to her. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Yes, you do, Mr. Cannon.” I stated, standing just a few inches from him. “You know exactly what I mean. I believe Ms. Swann hasn’t defend the title against you, or even Bree, because she doesn’t want to lose to either of you. She can’t handle someone being better than her, let alone someone she holds near and dear. She would not be happy for them. She would lose her mind, and social media, as well as SCW programming would be bombarded with a never-ending stream of bitching, whining, moaning, and complaining. Wouldn’t you agree?”

He seemed to become slightly upset. Showing a little emotion, as tears seemed to fill his eyes. “It is because of the pressure the SCW puts on her. She can’t handle it. It’s way too much at times.”

I shook my head. “Save it, Mr. Cannon. You don’t sign with the biggest company in the industry. You don’t do that and spend all your time talking about getting to the top, and when you achieve that status…you don’t bitch about the pressure.”

“Objection.” I heard Bree state.

“Overruled.”

There was a yelp I heard come from behind me, like Bree or Sienna, punched Bree’s dog. May have been both, but I was too in the zone to check. Selfish of me I know, but when you’re in the presence of those two, they may rub off on you. Fair warning, folks.

I kept my attention on Chris however. “Do you believe that is a fair assessment, Mr. Cannon?”

“Sasha…” He began. “Doesn’t help matters. She adds to that pressure.”

I couldn’t help it, but I groaned. “Oh, come off it, Mr. Cannon. Sasha allows Sienna to be in the main event scene.” Chris looked down, seeming to avoid eye contact. I shook my head, before looking at Judge Drachewych. “No further questions Your Honor.”

As I returned to my seat, I heard the Judge say, “Your witness, Ms. Lancaster would be Swann.”

“Mr. Cannon.” Bree began. “Do you and Sienna not have the best sex imaginable?”

“I’ve not tried you.” Chris stated.

“This is true, but we need to talk about your relationship with Sienna.”

“Then, yes we do.” He nodded.

“Wouldn’t it be fair to say that her vagina is much better than winning championship gold? Wouldn’t it be fair to say its better than winning the World title, in the biggest and best wrestling company in the industry and getting all the recognition that comes with winning such a prestigious title?”

Chris looked at Sienna, who seemed to be mouthing something to him. I immediately bolted from my chair. “Objection!”

“Under what grounds?” The Judge asked.

“Mr. Cannon is exchanging words with Ms. Swann. The man should be able to come up with his own thoughts.”

“Sustained.” He looked at Chris and Sienna. “The two of you are not to communicate during the course of this proceeding. Is that understood?” They nodded. He then looked at Bree. “You may continue.”

Bree nodded. “Do I need to repeat the question, Mr. Cannon?”

“No.” Chris stated.

He went to continue, but Bree cut him off. “That is all for now, Mr. Cannon. Thank you. No further questions.”

Judge Drachewych told Chris he could step down. He was taken back into custody before being ushered out of the courtroom. My client got my attention, asking what I was going for. “It’s just as we talked about. No worries.”

“Mr. Hayes.” The judge called. “Do you have any further witnesses?”

I nodded as I rose to my feet. “I do Your Honor.” I took another look at my client, reminding myself of why I was there, before I met the Judge’s gaze. “I call Sienna Swann to the stand.”

There were murmurs occurring in the crowd. The Judge slammed his gavel down once again, bringing order to the court. Sienna looked at Bree, both exhaling deep breaths before Sienna took the stand and was sworn in.

“Sienna.” I began, as I walked toward the jury. “How would you describe yourself?”

“Angelic.” Sienna said.

I nodded. “I see. What makes you angelic, as you put it? I’m just curious.”

“Have you seen me?” She asked, slyly.

I nodded once again. “I’m looking at you right now. So, you’re angelic because of your looks? Is that correct?”

“And all the things I have done. Lots of good things. You would know about them if you looked at what I said on Twitter.” She stated ever so confidently.

“You’re referring to tweets you exchanged with Kellen Jeffries and Simon Lyman, where you were called out for not being for the people. Correct?” She nodded, before I continued. “So, would it be safe to assume that you only mentioned those ‘good things’ because you were called out? Because it doesn’t seem like you’ve ever mentioned helping others, except for when you say you win your matches for the people, despite being heavily booed.”

“No.” She shook her head. “You’re not supposed to think that way.”

“And why is that?”

“Because what I say matters more than anything else.”

I nodded. “Indeed it does. That is why when you’ve possessed my client, your actions…your words…they belittle my client!”

“No. I love your client. I need her.”

“Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury…” I began, before running hands through my awesome head of hair. “Sienna has a sick obsession with my client. It comes off as if she cannot live without my client, making my client feel very uneasy about going anywhere else. Sienna comes off as if she is above everyone else, including her best friend and fiancé. This sick obsession has translated into Sienna feeling she is the absolute best in the universe. Would you believe that to be a fair assessment of who you are, Sienna?”

“Not at all. I’m angelic.”

“So, you keep saying. Is it angelic that when you came into possession of my client for the second time that you were assisted by outside interference from Chris Cannon? The man who has a habit of showing up out of nowhere when he searching for relevance?”

“I had nothing to do with that.” She said.

“And what about when you came into possession of my client for the third time? Did Chris not show up, along with a group masked individuals, helping you secure the win?”

“There was nothing in the rules stating it couldn’t happen.” She fired back, placing a hand on her hip, letting me know I shouldn’t have gone there. Oh no, I didn’t!

“And you’ve used that argument quite a bit, just as you used the argument regarding the fact you weren’t trained by Josh Hudson, or whoever trained Owen Cruze. It seems you have an argument or excuse for everything, would it not?”

“I really have to drive my point home.”

I sighed. “I see. So, how do you think you will react should you lose possession of my client? How do you think you will react should my client be given freedom?”

“Oh.” Sienna smirked. “There will be hell to pay. The people will not rest until I get back the World Championship. It is for them, after all.”

I scoffed. “The same people who have booed you each and every time you’ve been able to claim my client, or every single time you step in front of a camera?”

“They are not booing me.”

“Then what are they doing?”

“They chanting an angelic tune to go along with my ascension.”

I stared at Sienna for what felt like an eternity, questioning the never-ending flood of bullshit that came from her mouth, just like I was sure countless others did. Even Bree, but she never said anything because she didn’t want to lose her only friend. If one could actually call Sienna that, but I digress.

“No further questions, Your Honor.” I said, before returning to my seat.

Bree stood up and went to speak, but the Judge cut her off. “You don’t get to the examine the witness, Mrs. Lancaster.”

“May I ask why not?”

“Sure.” The Judge stated, with a slight sneer. “And I will tell you it is because you will agree with everything your client said. As you always do. Babe.”

“But…”

“One more word Ms. Lancaster, and I will hold your dog in contempt!” Bree sat down almost immediately. The Judge looked at me. “Mr. Hayes, would you like to give your closing argument?”

“As long as Your Honor believes its okay. I wouldn’t want it to seem as if there is some sort of bias here.”

He shook his head. “There is nothing but bias on the other side of the room, so I think we can even it out.”

“As you wish.” I said. “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury…My client.” I said, pointing in direction of the SCW World title. “Deserves a lot better. My client deserves to be treated like so much more than an accessory or prop. My client deserves to enjoy life and to have fun, instead of being involved in never-ending drama, or being treated like a possession. That is why if you grant my client freedom, then I will do my absolute best to ensure my client receives a good life filled with fun and excitement. A life where my client is shown to be more important than anyone else around. Do the right thing. My client needs it far more than Sienna Swann needs any kind of attention.”

I continued. “The SCW used to be a company where the SCW World Championship was given the proper attention. Now, my client is neglected and that needs to change. The SCW World Championship needs to be restored to being held in such high regard, and hotly contested and fought for. I intend on fighting for my client at the End of the Year special, just as I have done here today. Sienna Swann cannot get out of her own way. She is her own worst enemy, and her behavior does nothing but lower the value of my client. Therefore, I ask you the Jury, and your Honor, that my client be granted freedom, otherwise my client will continue on a downward spiral with Sienna Swann. If nothing changes, then the SCW will need to go ahead and close its doors, with the way Sienna is presented. The SCW needs to remember there are hungry superstars out there, and that Sienna is not the end all, be all despite the way she talks about herself. And that the SCW World Championship is the most important accomplishment in this industry, and that is not simply being Sienna Swann. Thank you.” I nodded before returning to my seat. The jury was asked to conduct their business to come up with a verdict. I looked over at my client. I could tell my client was nervous, just as I was. But I reminded myself again that my client was worth fighting for, and that I would stop at nothing to ensure freedom was granted, and that I was able to back up my words. Not only for the people, but for the SCW World Championship.